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We’ve updated our Terms of Use. You can review the changes here.

Thumb Wrestling Champions

by The Green Orbs

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1.
Ladies and Gentlemen!!! Welcome to the Thumb Wrestling Championship! Thumb Wrestling Champion You’re the Thumb Wrestling Champion You’ve got the thumbs that are faster and stronger than any other thumbs around Round 1! A ninja versus a wizard The ninja’s thumb was blurry cause it moves so fast! But then the wizard summoned a blizzard The ninja’s thumb froze and the wizard was the winner at last Thumb Wrestling Champion You’re the Thumb Wrestling Champion You’ve got the thumbs that are faster and stronger than any other thumbs around Round 2! A teddy Bear versus a pirate The pirate had one eye and a thumb made of wood But Teddy was relaxed and ready It took one plush push and the wooden thumb was splintered for good They’re pushin’ their digits to the limits Pushin’ their digits to the limits It’s the game for kings and queens The greatest game there’s ever been Even if your thumbs are sore. 1 2 3 4 I declare a thumb war! Round 3! A mummy vs. a pickle The mummy thought he had it cause pickles can’t move But the mummy’s thumb was dry and crumby His thumb turned to dust and the pickle’s ranking improved Thumb Wrestling Champion You’re the Thumb Wrestling Champion You’ve got the thumbs that are faster and stronger than any other thumbs around Round 4! A space slug vs. a sous chef The slug’s thumb was covered with a bunch of green slime But the sous chef didn’t feel stress She dipped her thumb in salt, and the slug’s thumb was down in no time Pushin their digits to the limits Pushin their digits to the limits It’s the game for kings and queens The greatest game there’s ever been Even if your thumbs are sore. 1 2 3 4 I declare a thumb war! Final Round! A Sasquatch vs. Abe Lincoln Abe had no chance against a thumb so vast But Lincoln’s always thinkin’ He started to speak of great events from the past Lincoln gave a speech And Sasquatch fell asleep He’s pushin’ his digits to the limits Pushin’ his digits to the limits Abe’s the champ and honestly He’s the greatest champ there’ll ever be We'll remember him for sure. 1 2 3 4 Cause Abe has won the thumb war! Pushin their digits to the limits.. (We’re gonna fight this battle with our thumbs) Pushin their digits to the limits (Until the battle is won) OOOOOOOooooooooo The greatest game there’s ever been OOOOOOOOOOOOOOoooooo 1 2 3 4 I declare a thumb war!
2.
I’ve got a new dance. It’s fun to do Come on and gather round, I will teach it to you It’s a new dance craze from under the sea Some of my octopus friends taught it to me It’s a dance you’re gonna love….. I’ll teach you the Suction Cup Shuffle An Octopus has 8 legs, I’m sure you know But even with two you can move to and fro So don’t be afraid. It’s simple to do. Just move your arms and legs and start to groove I promise it’s not too tough…. I’ll teach you the Suction Cup Shuffle Now wiggle wiggle (wiggle wiggle) ..POP! POP!! Wiggle wiggle (wiggle wiggle) POP! POP! Wiggle wiggle (wiggle wiggle) POP! POP! Wiggle wiggle (wiggle wiggle) It’s a dance you’re gonna love… I’ll teach you the Suction Cup Shuffle (Musical interlude) Now you’re wigglin’ and poppin’ across the floor You try to take a break but you’ll come back for more When the music plays you’ll start to wiggle When everyone is poppin’, you’ll begin to giggle It’s a dance you’re gonna love Come on everybody do the Suction Cup Shuffle! Now wiggle wiggle (wiggle wiggle) POP! POP!! Wiggle wiggle (wiggle wiggle) POP! POP!! Wiggle wiggle (wiggle wiggle) POP! POP!! Wiggle wiggle (wiggle wiggle) It’s a dance you’re gonna love…. I’ll teach you the Suction Cup Shuffle Now wiggle wiggle (wiggle wiggle) POP! POP!! Wiggle wiggle (wiggle wiggle) POP! POP!! Wiggle wiggle (wiggle, wiggle) POP! POP!! Wiggle wiggle (wiggle wiggle) This is a dance you’re gonna love Come on everybody, do the Suction Cup Shuffle
3.
Doug The Bug 02:52
Hi….my name is Doug I’m a bug But don’t kick me out Cause I’ll clean your rug Your carpet Smells like an armpit But I like it So let me get started My family Lives in your ceiling So I got a feeling You’ll see a lot of me I’ll just drop down Whenever you need me I’ll clean your carpet The first one’s a freebie My name is Doug Yes, I’m a bug But don’t kick me out Cause I’ll clean your rug No matter how dirty The more crumbs the better And if you want I also do sweaters My name is Doug Yes, I’m a bug But don’t kick me out Cause I’ll clean your rug Your carpet Smells like an armpit But I like it So let me get started
4.
Are you troubled by strange noises in the middle of the night? Is there mysterious fur clogging up your vacuum and your toilets? Have all your mashed potatoes gone missing? Well, worry no more! From the makers of “Nancy’s No More Nightmare Noodles” comes “Dr. Melvin’s Marvelous Monster Spray”! Two sprays a day, in each affected room, will keep those mischievous monsters at bay!! No more checking under your bed! No more checking in your closet! No more DOUBLE checking under your bed! And if you order right now, you’ll get 2 bottles of Monster Spray for more than the price of one. What are you waiting for...call now! Monster spray, monster spray Helps you keep those creatures away Spray it once, spray it twice Buy it and be monster free today!! (Spoken fast): May attract certain monsters. Safe to use around all pets except dogs, cats, and guinea pigs. Not for use on zombies, werewolves, pirates, or little brothers. Prolonged exposure may cause excessive hair growth, especially when combined with peanut butter. In the unlikely event that Monster Spray does not help your monster infestation, you should probably move.
5.
Outside 02:44
I love to go outside It’s always a new adventure Whatever the weather may be Any chance I get To go outside and breathe the fresh air That’s where I wanna be (cause) It’s so lovely When it’s a sunny day I just can’t wait To get outside and play…. sooooo I’m gonna splash splash splash in the ocean Dance dance dance in slow-motion! Sing a song to the flowers cause it’s so lovely to be outside I love to go outside It’s always a new adventure Whatever the weather may be Any chance I get To go outside and breathe the fresh air That’s where I wanna be (cause) It’s so lovely When it’s a rainy day I just can’t wait To get outside and play…. sooooo I’m gonna jump, jump, jump in the puddles Slide, slide, slide through the mud… I’ll never use an umbrella Cause it’s so lovely to be outside Bridge: I don’t care if it’s sunny or rainin’ As long as I’m outside, I’m not complainin’ (cause) It’s so lovely Even on a snowy day I just can’t wait To get outside and play…. sooooo I’m gonna chat chat chat, with a snowman Make make make snowballs to throw and Spend all day in my igloooooooo cause it’s so lovely to be outside Yes it’s so lovely to be outside….. That’s right it’s so lovely to be outside…..
6.
It’s always so exciting When you start to lose your teeth Kids love to see their toothless grins Sally has been waiting And waiting for so long That’s where our story begins Cause like other kids, Sally will soon see She’ll need some help from a fairy named Ruby Oh, my! My tooth is loose, and it feels so wiggly! All right! My tooth is loose, And I’m gettin’ so giggly! Because this means that for the very first time The tooth fairy will come for one of mine And I’m getting so excited Just to see What she’s going to leave for me So I’m twisting with my fingers Wiggling with my tongue I’m gonna keep on working Until this tooth is sprung So Sally kept on working She worked so hard for days Until it finally happened On the beach where she plays As she walked along the shore, She was searching for shells Her tooth fell in the sand And she began to yell Oh no! My tooth is lost I don’t think it’ll ever be found Oh rats! My tooth is lost and my smile has become a frown Because this means that after all this time the tooth fairy won’t give me a dime And I’m so sad because there will be Nothing underneath the pillow for me After seeing Sally’s tears, Her mom knew Exactly what was wrong And what to do “Have I ever told the tale of the famous fairy sleuth? There’s no need to worry, she’ll find that lost tooth! She’s Ruby, (Ruby) the tooth fairy. When you’ve got a gap in your grin, that’s when she steps in. She’s Ruby, (Ruby) extraordinary she’s the first one on the scene she’s the tooth collection queen! She’s Ruby, (Ruby) the tooth fairy Any molar malfunction she handles it with ease any canine conundrum we need her expertise Whether searching through the sandbox or on the playground Ruby is so talented that tooth will be found! She’s Ruby, (Ruby) the tooth fairy! Flying through stardust and moonbeams She’s the one you want on your team, She’s Ruby, (Ruby) extraordinary! She’ll never give up her pursuit so all the kids can get their loot She’s Ruby… So don’t be afraid if your tooth is misplaced It will be alright ‘cause Ruby’s on the case You can go to sleep Sally without any cares When you wake in the morning and look under your pillow You’ll see that Ruby’s been there
7.
My tests are getting harder and my homework is intense The numbers don’t add up and the words just don’t make sense And my parents just keep yelling cause my room is such a mess Aren’t I too young to have all this stress? I’m feeling very angry and I don’t know what to do I have a C in gym and want to quit...well wouldn’t you? And I find it very difficult to keep on pushing through How can I change my point of view? You’ve got to take it slow You make mistakes if you go too fast, you know So take a break before you lose control And you feel like you’ll blow You gotta take it slow I’m feeling very lonely and I might begin to cry I want to make some friends but it seems I’m just too shy Sometimes it’s overwhelming, I don’t even want to try Why can’t I go up and just say hi? And even in class I sit back in no man’s land And when I know the answer, I’m afraid to raise my hand This fear is so frustrating, no one seems to understand Can you help me come up with a plan? You’ve got to come out of your shell Keeping yourself hidden doesn’t always go too well People want to hear the stories you’ll tell So just be yourself! And come out of your shell! (Musical Interlude) I want to ride my bike but I still need my training wheels No one my age has them, how d’ya think that makes me feel I’m feeling so ashamed that I can’t ride a bike for real How did this become such an ordeal You've got to go your own speed It just might take some extra time to learn what you need Just keep at it and then you'll succeed Maybe even take the lead You've gotta go your own speed You’ve got to take it slow (take it slow!) You make mistakes if you go too fast, you know (don’t ya know to take it slow) So take a break before you lose control And you feel like you’ll blow (don’t wanna blow!) You gotta take it slow You gotta take it slow You gotta take it slow
8.
Child: Mommy! Mommy! Come here! I need you! Mom: What’s wrong honey? You sound like you’ve seen a ghost. C: No, mom. Ghosts aren’t real. You need to help! I hear a monster walking outside my window. He’s just waiting for me to fall asleep so he can come in here and get me! M: Honey, that’s not a monster....that’s just the raindrops hitting the sidewalk. But even if it was a monster, it couldn’t get in. Remember we use Monster Spray in our house so none of those pesky monsters will ever come in and bother us. C: But how do you know Monster Spray actually works, mom? M: Because it has the blue ribbon seal of approval from the Monster Prevention Society. So you can trust that Monster Spray will keep us safe…..plus it makes the house smell great. C: You’re right mom. Our house does smell great! Monster spray, monster spray Helps you keep those creatures away Spray it once, spray it twice Buy it and be monster free today!!
9.
I woke up this morning I thought I was still dreaming Walked into the bathroom Couldn’t believe what I was seeing! There’s a flower in my shower! (A lilac to be specific) More are growing by the hour boy it smells terrific There’s tiger lilies in my toilet, And a shrub in my tub I can’t wait to see what happens When I rub-a-dub-dub Ran into the food store Shopping with my mom As I stand and look around here I’m trying to stay calm!! (cause there’s) Daffodils in the dairy Begonias in the bread Magnolias in the macaroni They’re so pink and red Forget-me-nots in the fruit And violets among the vegetables Everything smells so good I bet it tastes incredible This day has been fantastic And it’s come as such a surprise Man, the world is beautiful With all these flowers in front of my eyes Went into our office Time to write some songs As the door is opened The fragrance is so strong There’s bluebells in my banjo A sunflower in my sax Buttercups in my bass Inspire an aromatic track There’s poppies in the piano And daisies in the drum What a symphony of smells This room has become! There’s a flower in my shower! (A lilac to be specific) More are growing by the hour boy it smells terrific There’s tiger lillies in my toilet, And a shrub in my tub I can’t wait to see what happens When I rub-a-dub-dub
10.
He goes to the park everyday Carrying a broccoli bouquet And with every bird that comes his way He shares his florets constantly? Nobody knows whence he came But we watch him all the same And we’ve never asked his name But we call him Robert Broccoli Oh….Robert Broccoli How many birds did you feed? Oh, Robert Broccoli You give them the greens that they need There in the snow and the rain He sits on a bench by the lane It’s such a sight to explain A fascinating study in ornithology He feeds every dove and blue jay A taste of his broccoli buffet So they’ll never fly away Cause they love their friend Robert Broccoli Oh….Robert Broccoli How many birds did you feed? Oh, Robert Broccoli Why broccoli, and not bird seed??
11.
12.
Child: Excuse me, sir? Man: Yes? Child: Um, there is a monster in the cereal aisle. Man What!! Oh my gosh! What do I do? Who do we call? This is not going to be good for business! Child: You don’t have to panic! Do you sell Monster Spray? Man: Dr. Melvin’s Marvelous? Why yes, of course. Child: Just go get it and spray it around the store. That monster will be gone in no time. My mom sprayed our house with it and we’ve been monster-free for months! Man: How did you get to be so smart? Child: It’s a gift. Jingle starts…… Child: Please don’t sing it again. Man: Oh, I’m sorry.
13.
Twelve steps to eating your veggies I hope this helps I hope this helps Step 1 Don’t freak out…. you’re gonna get through this Step 2 Close your eyes….aim your fork so you won’t miss! Step 3 Hold your nose …what you can’t smell, you cannot taste Step 4 Hum your favorite tune… and your veggies will vanish without a trace Step 5 Say hello to your veggies…. I look forward to working with you Step 6 Eat it fast……….Don’t think...just chew! Step 7 Remember, just because it is green, doesn’t make it mean Step 8 Just pretend you’re a rabbit...they love their green cuisine Use this information To cure your frustrations Make eating vegetation One big celebration Just use our solution To cure your veggie confusion And make a resolution For a veggie revolution Step 9 People eat veggies everyday….some people think they’re delicious Step 10 So take a deep breath… and remember… [breath].. they’re nutritious Step 11 Remember, even if you don’t like it, you’ll survive Step 12 So take your first bite, and realize…. you’re still alive!!! You’re still alive! You’re still alive! I hope this helps I hope this helps
14.
Soup is the best thing in the world.

credits

released September 7, 2018

Heather Hirshfield - Vocals
Eddie RosenBerg III - Vocals, Keyboards, Saxophones, Ukulele, Recorder, Harmonica, Melodica, Accordion, Washboard and Toy Frog
Chris Vatalaro - Drums
Mike Chiavaro - Bass
Ty Citerman - Guitars
Jeff Hermanson -Trumpet
Oscar Rodriguez - Additional Guitars on 1, 2 & 13
Rob McFayden - Additional Vocals on 1, 4, 5 & 6
Sophie Hirshfield - Additional Vocals on 1, 2, 3, 11 & 13
Livvie Hirshfield - Additional Vocals on 1, 2, 11 & 13
Abbie Hirshfield - Additional Vocals on 1, 2, 6 & 13
Persephone Paul - The kid on 8 & 12

Produced by Eddie RosenBerg III
Mixed and Mastered by Josh Valleau @ The Glass Wall in Brooklyn, NY
Album design by Nathan Heleine
Photos by Olivia Hirshfield

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The Green Orbs Evesham Township, New Jersey

The Green Orbs celebrate silly situations through song in the hopes that kids of all ages will laugh and sing along.

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